Busy Life

We are soooo very lazy today at our home. I can't motivate Byron to get up and do anything, and let's face it, I can't motivate myself to do anything. Wyatt just wanders around the house finding paper to draw on. Not a very intellectual stimulating day. Then I looked at my calendar and thought, "Oh forget it. I've got so much stuff coming up, I might as well conserve my energy!"



I realized one day talking to my friend, Sula, that even the closest friends and family really don't have the closest concept about what my schedule will be for the next 2 months. Sula just happened to glance at my fertility schedule issued by the doctor and exclaimed, "Good lands Sommer!" She all at once got "it." A few months back, when people were asking for some semi-large tasks from me, I would try to explain to them that, though I would do my best to help them, I needed them to know that I was about to undergo fertility treatments. They acted like they were understanding, but still really, really, really needed me to help. Expressing my frustration to my parents, my mom explained that these people didn't understand what I was about to do. And my dad stated, "You know what, Sommer, they don't care either." He was right. He didn't say it to be mean. He said it to help me see that it was my responsibility to say no to things I couldn't make time to do. It wasn't other people's problem to understand my life.

I still wish people could understand my life. I don't want them to understand so that they'll have pity on me. My friend Wendi and I were just discussing that there are so many people out there who have bigger problems than us. We really have no room to complain. I just want my friends and family to comprehend why I might be having a bad day and I don't want to go out. Or why I might be screening calls. Or why church responsibilities stress and freak me out. Or why I need just a little bit more sensitivity around me. I just want you to understand me.

P.S. Yes, I know I am obsessive with my organizing skills. Yes, I have color-coded the upcoming events on the calendar! :-P (I'm sticking my tongue out at you!) In case you were interested... Blue is Doc apps, Orange is meds both pills and injections, Pink is stuff concerning Wyatt (so boyish), and Yellow is church. Poor Byron and home life does not get any color, sadly very low priority.